The Bonus Family Handbook: The Definitive Guide to Co-Parenting and Creating Stronger Families

This diplomatic guide from family counselor Blackstone (Co-parenting Through Separation and Divorce) offers advice on how parents can navigate caring for a blended family. Expounding on dating after divorce, Blackstone recommends parents only introduce children to partners they’re serious about because kids crave consistency. She tackles the many issues parents should consider when creating a blended household, suggesting that parents wait to move in with a new partner’s family until they find a home with enough space to accommodate each child’s privacy needs, and that biological parents should set the rules for their kids while stepparents uphold them. Throughout, Blackstone entreats readers to approach everything, from establishing house rules to deflating tensions between an ex and new partner, by applying her “CARE” (communication, acceptance, respect, and empathy) framework, which entails listening to the concerns of all involved, taking “each other’s backgrounds and history into consideration,” respecting the opinions of others, and putting oneself in the other party’s shoes. The discerning advice covers how to manage an extensive range of scenarios—from splitting custody of children over holidays to resolving fights between stepsiblings and building relationships with stepchildren—with kindness and grace. Blackstone packs this encyclopedic manual full of insight. (Oct.)